I am at a loss!

I remember an older generation person saying many years ago, “All my family and friends are gone (i.e. dead).”

How well I know and understand that statement, especially now that I am in my 70s. My grandparents, my parents, my many aunts and uncles, most all of my first cousins, my four older brothers, and a nephew of mine are all gone.

Over the years, many of my friends have passed away. It seems the pace at which people close to me are dying has been speeding up.

Yesterday, I learned that a childhood friend of mine, who was one month younger than I, from the small neighborhood in which I grew up, has recently died. Last week, I learned of the recent death of a friend and former co-worker, a man one month older than I. Within the preceding two weeks, two of my high school classmates died. Four deaths of friends my own age within the past six weeks.

I am fortunate to be alive; I am thankful for the gift of life; I am grateful for the people in my life who show they love and care for me – my wife, my family, my friends. The people who love me, who care for me, who include me in their lives are precious to me. They give reason to me. My life is better because of them.

At the same time, I am deeply saddened by the loss of so many family and friends. Loss not only caused by deaths, but also loss of family and friends who have chosen not to include me in their lives. Given my age and health, the chances of joining my deceased family and friends increases exponentially with each passing minute. And with each passing minute, the chances of me ever again seeing and speaking with those who have cast me aside, forsaking me, are greatly diminished. I miss those I love who have abandoned me. Will I ever see them, again? Probably not.

I am at a loss!